Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Why I Can't Turn On My TV

As you can probably already tell from the obscene amount of complaining I do on this blog, I have very little tolerance for many things. I complain a lot, I am antsy a lot and lack patience all the time. But I am hoping some of you may be able to sympathize with the agony I go through when I turn on my TV mainly because of these commercials in particular.

The first one that makes me crazy is the commercial for Progressive. You know the scenario: the skinny blonde lady needs a good rate on her car insurance and FLO decides to show her how much she can save by using Progressive. Here is my problem, according to the autmoated sign in the background, she is saving about $300 and claims that, that is enough for a new pair of shoes. UMMMM OF COURSE IT IS! It is more than enough. Shoot, for that much, I could by at least 60 pairs of shoes from Payless. At least 10 if they are higher quality. And then FLO has the nerve to say, in reference to what she can buy with what she is saving, that she could also get "a big tripped out name tag." OMG, you are mad annoying.

The second set of commercials that make me want to throw my remote at the TV are the Subway commercials. Yes, please, I would like to see a slew of people singing about $5 foot longs. The newest one is by far the worst. The construction workers attempt dancing and the two business dressed ladies have horrible, horrible pitch, causing my to go into a whirlwind of anxiety. It onestly does reach a point where it is just too painful to watch. And answer me this, why is it that I go to Subway and never, ever spend only $5? Ridic.

The third set of commercials, the biggest offenders of bad advertising and the ones that just take the cake for the worst commercials ever are So help me God, if I ever see this guy in public, I will trample him, tie him up, sit him in front of a huge tv with the volume turned to obscenely high volume and force him to sit alone in a dark room to watch those stupid commercials on repeat until he has officially lost his mind, much like I already have. To top it all off, this guy is from Canada, his name is Eric Violette. Just another thing we can blame Canada for. But I guess it would not be fair to just blame the singer, perhaps I should tie up the person who thought up these dumb tunes too: David Muhlenfeld. Although, in his defense, I think he knows these commercials are making people psycho. He stated recently "Repetition alone will make something stick in a listener’s head. The question is, once your song is in their head, will they want to stick that head in an oven?” Well said, David.

In case you haven't had the chance to turn on your tv in the last few days, I thought I would show you the latest of the commercials warning everyone of the woes of bad credit...renaissance style? Ugh.

Where is an oven when you need one?


Anonymous said...

I can tell you from firsthand experience if you met Eric Violette he would charm your panties off. You would feel warm all over but not because you had your head in an oven. I met him in Florida last summer--OMG is he HOT!!!!!!!

Dani Leigh/Sweet D! said...

Hehe! I don't doubt it! I'm sure he would, and in that case, I would trample him and then tie him up for other reasons...

Josh & Becky said...

Okay, I'll agree that the commercial clip is horrid, but I'd say that even worse are:
1. The free-credit-report-dot-com-baby rap thingy that was on the radio last time I was home (Nov.)
2. The Frederick News Post radio song from two summers past. Awful awful and made me want to inflict pain on the next person who cut me off. (What's the FNP?...that one)